Keep Going

There are things that I don't have and maybe would NEVER EVER HAVE in this lifetime. But if you would ask me now how I look at my life, I'd say: I WOULDN'T HAVE IT ANY OTHER WAY. 

This really sums up how I feel right now. Maybe it's also a part of growing up: Accepting the things that we can't change. After the many things that have happened in my life, I can definitely say that these experiences really did make me stronger. Gone are the days when I would dwell on things which have already happened; because now, I've learned to just move on, continue living, just pray, and to always keep the faith. Food for thought! Hahaha! Goodnight!

Xoxo, 

Butchik

Someone Who?

Guys may think that girls have high standards when choosing a man whom they want to be with.
 It's a fact that GIRLS ARE THE MOST COMPLICATED BEINGS; but alongside with that is the fact that we are also just simple persons who want simple things. We may get impressed with something SO GRAND; but our hearts only wants the small things that only us girls would understand.
So take time to read what I am about to say. I may not be speaking for a lot of girls when I say these, but I believe that any girl would understand what I mean. =)

"A GIRL'S WISH"

I don't need someone who has a nice car; just someone who I can ride the bus, the jeepney, and the tricycle with.

I don't need someone who is so good looking; just someone who I can look at and feel like the happiest person alive.

I don't need someone who's so mature; just someone who is childish enough to understand that I am a girl, and mature enough to understand that I am a woman.

I don't need someone who is so intelligent; just someone who I can have a good conversation with.


I don't need someone who is so popular; just someone who is proud enough to introduce me to his family and his friends.


I don't need superman; just someone who would be strong enough to protect me whenever I feel so weak and helpless.

I don't need a poet; just someone who would be willing to write me a love letter, no matter how short it may be.

I don't need a good singer; just someone who would be willing to sing me a song, no matter how out of tune it may be.

I don't need a millionaire; just someone who would be willing to make me appreciate life's simplicity no matter in what grand way it may be


I don't need a prince, and I don't need a happily ever after; just someone who can sweep me off my feet and make me want to spend my life with him FOREVER AFTER. 

-- Dear someone, read this will you?hahaha!!

xoxo,
butchik

Everything Pays off in the end (My 15-minute post)

I really do believe that in this life, we only get what WE DESERVE. It's not Karma, really; it's just getting what is due to us.

There were many instances in my life when I have experienced this. When I do nothing, I get NOTHING. But when I do something, I will also get SOMETHING in return (sometimes even BIGGER "SOMETHINGS").

There really is a higher BEING who sees what we do, and rewards us for doing them as well. Of course, if we do something bad, then punishment is to be expected.

But really, I AM CONTINUOUSLY BEING AMAZED by how things work in this world.
MY FAITH WILL NEVER EVER BE SHAKEN.

"THE THINGS THAT WE DO REALLY MATTER"

Maybe this is the reason why there people who are blessed. And when I say blessed, it does not mean being MATERIALLY BLESSED. Aha! I just got an idea about my next post! Hahaha!

--That's all for now, I have to get back to my studies! Happy Friday Everyone! =)

UNCERTAIN

"If there's one word that could describe your life right now, what word would that be?"

This question has always been asked to us, but always remains to be a hard one to answer.

Right now, I've been contemplating about how my life is as of the moment. I know that there are many words that could describe how my life is now, but if there is one word which I think would be the best, I think that that would be the word, "UNCERTAIN".

And I'm sure that this goes on to many others too. No one in this world can say that their life is CERTAIN. 

I've always said, and I have always believed that the best way to enjoy life, is to ENJOY THE UNCERTAINTY that comes with it.

This is easy to say, but is VERY DIFFICULT TO DO.

There will always be this part in us that would want to know what the future holds. Maybe because we want to be prepared, or maybe because we just can't bear the thought of not knowing what's going to happen to us the next day. In this fast-paced world that we have now, we are always being advised that we should take a breather, and appreciate the things that are going on in the present. The days pass by so fast that we would just be surprised that another year is over. 

I've always been trying to keep my focus on what's happening in the present, but I will still always keep on thinking about what I should do the next day.  Sure, I'd usually want to "seize the day", but that doesn't mean that my mind would stop and not go about what's going to happen next.

This made me think that:

"MAYBE LIVING IN THE MOMENT IS DIFFICULT BECAUSE OF THE FACT THAT WE KNOW THAT THERE WILL ALWAYS BE TOMORROW"

That's why it's hard to stay relaxed for a day; for we know that the next day may not be RELAXING at all.

Being in law school made me think that way. After a long week of studying, I would always say that I should take a day to relax and not think about my studies for a while. I would feel calm, sure, but then just as I was about to come close to the end of that day, my heart would start pounding again as I think about what's going to happen to me the following week.

I would always say to my friends whenever they ask me if law school is difficult that "It's not difficult, it's just tiresome".  I don't want to sound so arrogant, but I really believe that. It would really entail a lot work, LOTS of it i tell you!!!hahaha!! But I don't want to vocalize any negative words, so I don't want to say the word "DIFFICULT", but rather, i'd say that "It would take a lot of your time and effort". Hahahaha!! 

Being a graduate of B.S. Psychology, I have come to realize just how powerful our mind really is! 

So if we produce negative words, our mind would absorb that, and it will stick to it FOREVER! (True Story)

There have been a lot of trying times, but I would always try my best to look at these things in the MOST POSITIVE WAY THAT I COULD.  Of course it's not easy; i would not call it denial too. It is more of a matter of MINDSET. 

Right now, a lot of things come into my mind. I would like to write them all, but then it would just be too much.  So I guess what I would just like to say is  in this life, there are and will always be challenges ahead. It would make us want to quit, it would even make us cry, and it would make us want to give up. But at the end of the day, what would matter is how we would take all of them, and how we will keep everything in stride. With perseverance, faith, and prayers, no uncertainties can ever pull us down. 

I have said that:

"MAYBE LIVING IN THE MOMENT IS DIFFICULT BECAUSE OF THE FACT THAT WE KNOW THAT THERE WILL ALWAYS BE TOMORROW"

But then I've realized that it should more be of this way:

"WE SHOULD LIVE IN THE MOMENT AND ENJOY EVERY MOMENT OF IT EVEN IF WE  FAILED BECAUSE WE KNOW THAT THERE WILL ALWAYS BE A NEW TOMORROW"

See?it's just a matter of turning things around! Hahaha!!

Kudos to LIFE'S UNCERTAINTY!

Sad Movies,,,always make me cry.....

(Okay, who wouldn't cry while watching a sad movie right?Haha!)

"A walk to Remember" will always remain to be one of my favorite movies Ever!!!

Just last week, I have decided to watch this movie (for the nth time!) again. I really don't know why but I just always cry whenever I watch this film! The emotions just keep on coming back to me, as if it was the first time I have seen the movie. I can definitely say that this is one of the most heartfelt movies ever. It literally speaks to my heart and to my mind that everytime that I watch it, these systems of my body would immediately know how they would react.

Not content of having watched the movie, the following day, I have decided to read the last part of the book. And guess what? I ALSO CRIED!

Call me crazy, but this is just how good this movie is! Maybe not everybody can appreciate this movie, but believe me, IT IS A GOOD MOVIE! haha!

A walk to remember is very cliche! But it will forever be a cliche that would never become annoying!

"In Beaufort, North Carolina, a prank on a student goes terribly wrong and puts the student in the hospital. Landon Carter, a popular student with no defined plans for the future, is held responsible and forced to participate in after-school community service activities as punishment, which include starring as the lead in the school play. Also participating in these activities is Jamie Sullivan, the reverend's daughter who has great ambitions and nothing in common with Landon. When Landon decides he wants to take his activities seriously, he asks Jamie for help and begins to spend most of his time with her. But he starts to develop strong feelings for her, something he did not expect to do. The two start a relationship, much to the chagrin of Landon's old popular friends and Jamie's strict reverend father. But when a heart-breaking secret becomes known that puts their relationship to the test, it is then that Landon and Jamie realize the true meaning of love and fate. "


MEMORABLE QUOTES FROM THE MOVIE:


"Jamie: You don't know the first thing about being someone's friend.
Landon: I don't want to just be your friend.
Jamie: You don't know what you want.
Landon: Neither do you. Maybe you're just too scared that someone might actually want to be with you.
Jamie: And why would that scare me?
Landon: Because then you wouldn't be able to hide behind your books, or your frickin' telescope, or your faith. No, no, you know the real reason why you're scared? It's cause you wanna be with me too." 




" Landon: Jamie has faith in me. She makes me want to be different, better. "


" Landon: Our love is like the wind... I can't see it, but I sure can feel it. "


--- Cynics would say that this is just too cliche of a love story. But hey, love stories are not for everyone right? hahaha!! 




For more information about this movie click the link BELOW:

" A WALK TO REMEMBER MOVIE "

source: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0281358/

My Portfolio

I've been trying to utilize the DSLR Camera that we've bought around 7 months ago...I am really trying to maximize all the things that I can do with it...I am really just beginning to get the hang of it so pardon me if they are so amateur.  Here are some of my sample pictures...

Shutter Speed: 1/10

Aperture: f/8

Focal Length: 48mm

Sensitivity: ISO1600

Shutter Speed: 1/200

Aperture: f/6.3

Focal Length: 55mm

Sensitivity: ISO1600

Shutter Speed: 1/200

Aperture: f/6.3

Focal Length: 55mm

Sensitivity: ISO100

Shutter Speed: 1/3

Aperture: f/6.3

Focal Length: 40mm

Sensitivity: ISO1600

Shutter Speed: 1/3

Aperture: f/6.3

Focal Length: 40mm

Sensitivity: ISO1600

Shutter Speed: 1/50

Aperture: f/6.3

Focal Length: 52mm

Sensitivity: ISO3200

Shutter Speed: 1/15
Aperture: f/5.3
Focal Length: 44mm
Sensitivity: ISO1100
Taken: 8/8/11

By the way, my camera is just an entry-level camera, which perfectly matches me as well: an entry-level-struggling-photographer...(or just someone who likes to take pictues hahaha!!)...I really love taking pictures..because it can paint a thousand words..hahaha!! 

So it's June

Been in hiatus for a while because I can't really think of what should I be posting. Anyway,it's already JUNE!! I can't believe that it is already half of the year!!! Here in Manila, June means that  it's the start of another school year!! I know for most of my batch mates (both in High School and College), this is just another typical day at work. Well not for me; because I as well will be going to school this semester. I may sound as if I love schooling so much, but I really do! hahaha! Nothing beats that feeling of buying new school stuff, meeting new people, that sort of things.  However, I know that it's all going to be different this time, because I will not be just going to school; I'll be going into LAW SCHOOL!! whew!! The truth is, it really hasn't sinked in yet, but I know that once school starts, it will all come right back at me!

Entering law school has not really been my plan; for the longest time, my dream had always been to become a DOCTOR. But things really do happen in college; it is really where you will find where you are supposed to be heading. So anyway, it will not be for another week before I officially start schooling again, but I'm really looking forward to it! I don't know what to expect, I don't know how to feel, but I am excited about it. This will be a new  chapter in my life, and I can't wait to see what's going to happen!! Until next time!!! =)

Venting Out

For the past few weeks, I've been keeping this thing inside me. I really want it to be something that I should celebrate first with myself and my family. I never want others to know about it; and I guess they wouldn't be that too interested to know. All I can say is that this thing is what I really want; it may not be what I have wanted in the past, but I'm sure that this time it is what I WANT. I knew it because the night when I knew about it, I was genuinely happy, and I felt that it was really meant to be.

You may be wondering why the title of this post is "Venting Out"

Actually, the main reason why I am writing this right now is because I've been thinking a lot lately. There are many things that are bothering me right now. I don't know how I should say it, but let me keep it this way:

"I am tired of people making me realize that my dream is not for me"

I've said this because I know that there are many people there who are not genuinely happy for this BIG LEAP that i took. But like what I have said, I am tired of it. I am an observant type of person and I know what I see; my understanding of things go beyond what is visible to the eye. So, people may act positively, but I can tell that they are not.

But I've also realized that I should stop worrying now. God gave me this opportunity because he knows that I asked for it for a certain reason. It is a reason between me and HIM; and I am really thankful that he has given me it. He also gave me this chance because he knows that I can do it. So starting now, I will start living my dream!!! I will not be bothered by what others think because it is what's supposed to happen. Like what I always tell my friends:

"Life is too short to be worrying about what others think" 

So I guess it's time that I start remembering it; and live by it!

Thank you Lord for everything!!! 

MAKE IT RIGHT!

I have just graduated last April 1st 2011; it was a very happy moment, (and I will post about it here SOON) and just like how I have described that day: everything was so SURREAL! I don't know if it's because it felt as if everything went by so fast; or if it's because I feel like there is still no closure with my studies. It's weird right? That despite working hard for the past four years in order to gain a degree, I still feel as if it is still not enough. I have always said that I wanted to be a physician ever since I was a little girl; but things really happen in college. I guess it's really true that it is in college where you will know where you will truly belong.


 Like what I have mentioned in my post before: (click to read my post) 

"Sometimes what we thought were meant for us are actually just things that would guide us in going to the place where we really belong to". '

As of the moment, I can confidently say that my future is a tad more clear. I am now confident that I will really be heading somewhere. I know that there will be more uncertainties that would come my way, there may even be times when I would feel like giving up; but I should also ALWAYS ALWAYS keep in mind that this time, it would be different. This is really my future now; and I should do all that I can in order to really MAKE IT RIGHT!


Thank you Lord for all the blessings!!!! You always surprise me!!!!

A FRESH START. A NEW CHANCE.

Just as the clock stroke 12 this morning, a certain change happened in my life as well. For so many months now, I've been very anxious and confused as to where I will be heading next; but now, the future seemed to be more clear for me. I can't really say what it is as of now; but all I can say is that I am SO SO THANKFUL right now! Thank you Lord for giving clarity to my life! This is definitely a sign that I should start a new and better life. I asked you for this chance, and you really gave it to me LOUD and CLEAR! I will not let you down! I WILL MAKE YOU PROUD!

I LOVE THIS DAY!! This is the BEST WAY TO END MY MONTH!

-Chick =)

FUTURE!

When I was a little girl, I have always thought about the future. It is what I have always talked about and it is something that I just cannot wait to happen. I remember riding in our car one time thinking of what I wanted to become,and then I told myself that I cannot wait for the day when that dream comes true and I will look back to that day; the day when my dreams were just dreams. Fast forward to today, I have realized that it has been 10 years since I had that dream. Of course, I cannot really tell if it has already happened; but i do know that I am now living that dream.

Who knows where I will end up to, and who knows what will happen?

Before, I've always felt that I should be planning my future twenty steps ahead; it is what my mom and dad told me. However, seeing things now, I am not sure if that would really work for me. Because for them, it really did work; they have achieved their goal at their desired time. But I am not them; i want to be like them, i just don't think that I have what it takes.

You see, ever since I was little, I have only one goal in my mind; it is the only thing that I was really aiming at. But then college happened. And now, I really do believe that it is really in college when you will find where you belong. During my sophomore year, I had this two specific classes which have really opened my eyes to the other possibilities. I have never considered them as options before; but now, I really do. I must admit that I really felt scared upon realizing what I wanted to happen. Imagine dreaming of something all your life, and then all of a sudden, you will take a big turn and change that dream. I felt like a kindergarten student again; not knowing what to expect, what to do, and how to do things again.

But that's life; sometimes what we thought were meant for us are actually just things that would guide us in going to the place where we really belong to. Sure, there are still uncertainties that would come our way; but when you have finally found where you really want to go, I guess there would be nothing that could hinder us from being driven and in achieving that one TRUE GOAL that we have. As of today there are still about six months before college would commence; and a lot could happen in those six months. But as of now too, I am sure of what my options are; and i am more driven as ever!

See you Future! I hope it wouldn't be too long!

Xoxo,
Chick

Why I don't want to fall in love

Okay, don't be too surprised. The title is actually "Why I don't want to fall in love...Just Yet"

The title is just for suspense value =)

So here's my story...

First let me introduce myself:

"Hi! My name is Butchik Santos!

I am already 19 years old, I am in the last year of my teenage life, I have never had a boyfriend since birth, and I have never fallen in love."

This may be hard to admit for some people; but I, on the other hand, am proud of it!

You see, for the past nineteen (19) years of my life, I have seen a lot of "INSTANCES OF LOVE".

Instance #1: People who were once so madly in love who later on become bitter exes in the end.

Instance #2: People who have been together for a long time but ended up being with other people in the end.

Instance #3: People getting so vulnerable because of love

Instance #4: People getting so STUPID because of love

Instance #5: People forgetting their friends because of love.

Instance #6: People crying for days because of love.

Instance #7: People getting fat because of love (true story)

Instance #8: People becoming UNREASONABLE because of love

Instance #9: People disregarding their family because of love

Instance #10: People committing suicide because of love (I know right?haha!but true story indeed!)

These are some of the things that I have discovered about being in LOVE.

I may seem negative for writing all of these things, but these things really do happen; they did happen!

And how did I know?

Because these people came to me, asking for advice. Can you imagine?These people asked for an advice from someone who hasn't even been in love in the first place!I guess instance #4 is correct.Haha!Kidding!

So anyway, being someone who has not experienced all the drama, I am not really sure if these people are giving me warnings or if they were terrorizing me or something. Hearing all these things really scares me!

I have always been this person who is good in giving advices. I can make a person feel better by giving words of encouragement. But somehow, I cannot help but think that someday, these things can also happen to me; and that I will also be needing advices. This is my biggest fear!

Okay, maybe at this point you may think that I am crazy or something; or that I am an anti-LOVE person. Actually, I really am not; I am scared, that's true, but I also do believe that being in LOVE is the greatest thing in this world. Nothing can compare to that feeling of giving away a part of yourself to someone you really value the most. I also still think that this is something that I just cannot wait to experience in the near future.

But here's the deal:

I am not against LOVE (like what I have said), but I am against LOVE IN THE WRONG TIME.

One thing that I have noticed from all those people whom I have helped (naks!haha!), is that they always get hurt in the end because the love that they had was not mature enough; or that they fell in love too easily. Sure, it feels nice to be impulsive once in a while; but when it comes to love, i think IMPULSIVENESS DOES NOT REALLY WORK. They say that when love hits you, you would just know it. So the tendency is for people to act on in immediately, feel really good, and then eventually end up being hurt. And this brings me to formulate this saying in my mind:

"Nothing can explain how love happens; but there are lot of explanations about how it fades."

Sounds unfair right? How love is unexplainable, but falling out of love has many reasons. Maybe that's just it; being in love is complicated. Even the best-selling authors cannot give a precise and exact definition about what love is. And I guess it is also because not all people experience the same kind of love. Maybe what I consider as love may not be considered as love by other people, and it works both ways.

See how complicated it is?

So I guess those people who were able to find their true love on their first try really are the lucky ones. They don't have to suffer the agony of the process of breaking up, or the feeling of being a failure, and the feeling of being worthless in the end. I may sound ambitious, but this is the kind of love which I am dreaming to have. Maybe what I said before about being scared can be best explained by this: I do not know yet how I will love someone or in what level will I fall. This scares me because I do not know if I will also end up hurting like the others; or if I will also get stupid, or unreasonable, or FAT! haha!

These are the questions in my mind; these may also be the reasons that's been holding me back.

But I guess I am really just being careful; I do not want to rush into things because I know that if I am ready, it will happen. And I GUESS by that time, I will also be ready to be hurt, be stupid, and be unreasonable; but I am SURE that when that happens, I will be stronger. Preparing my heart for the battle is what I am doing right now. And those instances of love? Well, they are just my guide. Because when the time comes, I know I will also be able to write my own "LOVE INSTANCES"; and they will be the best!

Xoxo,

Chick

This article speaks out for everybody..and I LOVE IT!!!

My daughter’s letter to the man she will love someday

By Cathy Babao-Guballa
Philippine Daily Inquirer

RELATIONSHIPS ARE always a difficult terrain to navigate.

As a woman, you spend hours pondering—alone or with your girl friends—the intricacies of the human heart. You always hope and pray that the next generation will get it better than you did.

Below is a letter I found in my daughter’s website (I have her permission to share this). She wrote it to “the man I will someday love.”

I was expecting to read a gushing, romantic, idealistic tome. I was humbled instead by her sentiments. It’s filled with sensible expectations.

I pray that this will make every girl believe that hope does spring eternal, and even if your heart has been broken a few times, you can always put the pieces back together, and make it right the next time around.

Take your time. Don’t rush and don’t just “settle.” If it’s part of His plan, God’s best awaits you out there.Letter

Dear You,

I will admit that sometimes I really do wonder if you exist.

There is a part of every little girl’s heart that envisions her prince charming. At age three, it is usually of a man who can save her from the wrath of an evil stepmother, wake her from eternal slumber or give her that true love’s kiss.

In elementary school, he becomes the boy with the least cooties, the one who’s willing to cross the playground to share his Oreos even if it makes him a target for the week of all the other boys.

Come high school, it’s that boy you stand with at prom, who your father stared down at the door, who provided you with an experience complete with photos you will cringe at a decade later, a corsage that yellows in the refrigerator, and a faded memory of a night that seemed almost too magical to be real.

Nineteen years into this life, however, and still unwilling to give my heart away, I am still that same little girl who hopes for her prince charming. And although I wonder why it has taken you this long to sweep me off my feet and whisk me off to your palace on horseback, I know that it is probably because meeting you will be better than any fairytale I could’ve read as a kid.

A couple of heartbreaks and a few years wiser though, I will admit that there are times when I question your existence. Because I have yet to meet the guy who makes me hear songs like “All My Life” or “A Whole New World” in my head when I see him does not mean I don’t hope that it’ll ever happen.

I may already know you or may still meet you someday—something I leave completely up to God because I’m pretty sure our story will be epic.

However, I can’t promise you that I’d make the world’s most perfect princess. In fact I’ll probably keep you on your toes and amuse you with my eccentricities—there are a lot of them. I’ll probably steal a bunch of your T-shirts and turn them into shirt dresses, or drive you slightly mad with my obsessive compulsivity and my need to fix your collar constantly.

I can promise to be your best friend however—that person you can rant to after a rough day, the hand you can hold when you get sad, or the person you can text when situations get awkward.

I’ll probably mess up your hair sometimes and hug you for too long, but that’ll only be because I absolutely adore you. I’ll bury my head in your shoulder during scary movies and make you feel like superman when you kill those flying cockroaches that really shouldn’t exist. I’ll cook your favorite food on your birthday and try my best to make friends with your mom.

I’ll respect your nights-out with the boys and make you seem like the perfect guy to my barkada. I’ll watch basketball or soccer games with you, and not complain when you cheer too loudly at the TV set.

I’ll know the difference between giving you space and being constantly there for you—even if it means sitting and playing video games with you or taking hot chocolate runs when it rains.

I’ll listen to your music and we’ll go on epic adventures together—seeing the world, taking awesome pictures, eating awesome food, and never running out of things to tell each other along the way.

I won’t be waiting for you to sweep me off my feet and take me on a magic carpet ride, because I know I won’t need anything like that to fall for you—I will love you for you.

You will be that someone to make goofy faces with in pictures, to lace fingers with when I’m lonely, and to take long walks under the stars with on the beach.

You’ll be the guy who takes me the way I am—and will laugh as I burst into Disney song or pick out pink wallpaper.

You’ll be that someone I envision a future with—us filling out visa forms as we travel the universe, picking out our first dog together and arguing about what to name it, or being snap-happy stage parents in our preschooler’s annual mini-plays. And I keep hoping that maybe someday when we find each other, you will become that someone whose smile I wake up to in the morning and the last one I speak to every night.

So to the man I know does exist, and who will help me maybe make sense of the world someday, this man I can’t wait to love. Please know that I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you. But for now, I wait. Fingers crossed and palms held together, I hope that you’re out there somewhere, waiting for me, too.

With the hope I will be yours for always,

Me

Who am I?

There always comes a time when we feel lost; a time when we somehow feel disconnected to our own selves. It's weird, I know, and it's hard to understand. But during these times, the only option to do is to ask ourselves this question: "Who am I?".

Millions of people find this to be the most difficult question to answer. And although a lot of self-help books have been published in order for people to discover themselves, this question still remains to be a difficult one to give an answer to.

You know why?

Because the truth is, there is really no answer to this question. No one in this universe can fully answer who they REALLY are; and more so, to give specific details on who they TRULY are.

This came up to me one time because a certain instance came when I forgot who I am. For a while, i seemed to forget what I was like, what I am like, and what I will be like. You see, as far as I know, I am an easy-going person. Sure, I have my own problems, frustrations, and other things which make me sad; but never was I the person who will succumb to negativity and drown myself into tears. I cry, yes, but only for valid reasons; and that is when it only comes to my family and friends. So when this "instance" came, I was actually surprised with what kind of person I turned out to be.

I cannot give a specific details as of the moment, but you know what I have discovered after that?

I have discovered that for the most years of my life, I have put up a wall and found it hard to let people come in into my life. All this time, I never thought that letting people in was actually my greatest fear.I never knew that I was actually afraid of being too much involved with someone because I'm scared of being too attached and just be hurt in the end. And I never knew that I could cry because of someone who I have been constantly denying to be a part of my heart. I wouldn't call it a heartbreak though; but having that thing in your stomach upon knowing something is the worst feeling in the world. It's like something is pulling your tears to fall down; but because you are trying to remain firm in your beliefs and show the world that you are strong, you are doing everything to hold it in. But tell you what, it never works.

And you know why?

Because at the end of it, there will be nothing else left for you to do but to give in to your emotion and well, you know, to cry. Somehow I figured out that crying is actually a good thing. Crying will always be the last resort for all human beings. And crying does cleanse our soul; it helps wash out our problems and clear out our hearts of the things that have been bothering us. Sure, there will still be some parts of the hurt feeling; but releasing your tears can actually give you a certain feeling that nothing in this world can ever replace: FREEDOM. Because only upon finally accepting defeat from our emotions can we only know and discover some parts of who we truly are. This gives us the liberty to explore the other parts of our personality and to accept each one of them as they emerge from our experiences.

Discovering ourself may be the longest journey that we would ever take as we are living. This is an unending quest that no one has ever finished venturing; not even the ones who have already passed away. And I think this may be the reason why God has given us the ability to think and to feel; because he wants us to use both as we conquer the true purpose of our life: discovering who we are and why we ever existed.

I LOVE LIFE!!

I LOVE LIFE!!!

Half of my ♥

HALF OF MY HEART

By: John Mayer

I was born in the arms of imaginary friend

Free to roam made a home out of everywhere I've been

Then you come crashing in, like the realest thing

Trying my best to understand all that your love can bring

Oh, half of my heart's got a grip on the situation

Half of my heart takes time

Half of my heart's got the right mind to tell you that

I can't keep loving you

Oh, half of my heart

I was made to believe I'll never love somebody else

I made a plan, stayed the man

Who can only love himself

Lonely was the song I

'till the day you came

Showing me a better way and all that my love can bring

Oh, half of my heart's got a grip on the situation

Half of my heart takes time

Half of my heart's got the right mind to tell you that

I can`t keep loving you

Oh, half of my heart   with half of my heart

Your faith is strong

But I can only fall so far so long

Time to hold, later on

You will hate that I never gave more to you

than half of my heart

But I can't stop loving you

But I can't stop loving you     

But I can't stop loving you

With half of my, half of my heart

Oh, half of my heart

Half of my heart's got a real good imagination

Half of my heart's got you

Half of my heart's got a right mind to tell you
That half of my heart won't do

Half of my heart is a shotgun wedding to a bride with a paper ring      

Half of my heart is the part of a man who's never

truly loved anything
 

Oh, half of my heart

Oh, half of my heart

Half of my heart

Oh, half of my heart

Half of my heart 

Oh, half of my heart




Can I just say How much I LOVE this song?




Listening to the song, you could tell that it is melancholic and it expresses a feeling of sadness and despair.

What more could be sadder than a story of a boy who, because of his feeling of insufficiency for the girl that he loves, just chose to leave.

I don't really know why, but somehow in a way, i really felt connected to this song.

The moment i first listened to it, I knew that this song would make a huge impact to my heart.

True enough, my heart does beat differently whenever i hear the song.

It's like the song is directly talking to my heart

No other song have made me feel this way, and that I can assure with MY WHOLE HEART!

naks!!!=)

Maybe some time in the future I would be able to explain the reason behind this.

Trust me, I don't the explanation as of the moment as well.

I LOVE LIFE!!=)

After 10 days....

Wow!! Time really does fly fast!! It's already exactly a day after i last posted. So what happened during the last 10 days? Hmmmmmm Let me see..

July 10 : My ate's birthday dinner at Racks's Megamall. It was a fun night even if it's really tiring

July 11: The much awaited Althemar's - Bellemundo bowling match. Super fun!! although we lost again. How I wish we also had more time to bowl like them. They were really good!!! By the way, the Bellemundo team is actually my mom's bestfriend's family. We've know them since we were very young and so they are like our family already. It's always fun bonding with them!=)

July 12: Yikes!! Our Art Appreciation class presentation day!! This is actually my first time to play the guitar in front of my classmates. I played once during my 18th birthday because i don't really think that I am that good yet hahaha!!

July 13: I just stayed home today to do my HR presentation/report. Nothing much happened today

July 14: No classes today because of Typhoon Basyang!! Oh my Gosh!!this typhoon scared the hell out of me. I was really scared and restless the whole morning (aroudn 12 am to 5 pm). You see, our house is quite high so the wind directly aimed at us; and it feels as if there is an earthquake! (this is not an exaggeration!). I'm just really thankful to God because He kept us safe!

July 15: First day of OJT today at the UST College of Science Guidance and Counseling department.I really had fun! Actually, way too much fun!! Hahaha!!

July 16: Last day of the week today!! I was really happy during this day because I got to recite in our Economics and Taxation class!!Woohooo!! It was definitely a great end of school week!!

July 17: Oxford went to the hospital today because of an abrupt fever. We stayed pretty much the whole day at Medical City. Thank God he's fine and was not admitted

July 18: We attended the 10 am mass at the St.Francis of Assisi Parish Church. By the way, this is the church where my brother, sister, and I, and now my nephew too, were all baptized. Purrtyyy Cool huh?hahaha!! I also bought a netbook today!! Yay!!Finally!! I wouldn't have to wait for my sister to come home before i can use her laptop. haha! Kawawa naman ako diba? So finally, my parents took pity on me and bought me a netbook. And i thought, i would have to sell my iphone to buy one. hahaha!! Yay! Too many things to be thankful for!!

I LOVE LIFE!!!

I LOVE GOD!!!

It's a new week!!

-Chick

My NYC Trip

Since Boredom striked me, my imagination took me to a whole new level...

I was browsing through vacation spots to go to this coming semestral break with my family. But halfway through, I got bored.

But this boredom eventually turned into something interesting and fun. Because just minutes ago, i've decided to go to New York!!hahahaha!!!

(Now we're talking..LOLS!!)

You know what immediately comes into my mind when i hear "New York"?..FRIENDS!!

As i have always mentioned, FRIENDS is my ultimate favorite TV Show ever!!whoa!!..I still watch its reruns in certain cable channels. And I can watch My FRIENDS DVD over and over again and still laugh at the funny parts. Talk about addiction right?hahaha!!

So going back, New York is the setting of this hit TV show. And it is also where my imaginary trip will be...

First, let me share with you a brief information about this "City that Never Sleeps"

GEOGRAPHY

New York City is located in the Northeastern United States, in southeastern New York State, approximately halfway between Washington, D.C. and Boston .The location at the mouth of the Hudson River, which feeds into a naturally sheltered harbor and then into the Atlantic Ocean, has helped the city grow in significance as a trading city. Much of New York is built on the three islands of Manhattan, Staten Island, and Long Island, making land scarce and encouraging a high population density.

The five boroughs:

The Bronx (Bronx County: Pop. 1,373,659) is New York City's northernmost borough, the site of Yankee Stadium, home of the New York Yankees, and home to the largest cooperatively owned housing complex in the United States, Co-op City. Except for a small piece of Manhattan known as Marble Hill, the Bronx is the only section of the city that is part of the United States mainland. It is home to the Bronx Zoo, the largest metropolitan zoo in the United States, which spans 265 acres (1.07 km²) and is home to over 6,000 animals. The Bronx is the birthplace of rap and hip hop culture.

Manhattan (New York County: Pop. 1,620,867) is the most densely populated borough and home to most of the city'sskyscrapers, as well as Central Park. The borough is the financial center of the city and contains the headquarters of many major corporations, the United Nations, as well as a number of important universities, and many cultural attractions, including numerous museums, the Broadway theatre district, Greenwich Village, and Madison Square Garden. Manhattan is loosely divided into Lower, Midtown, and Uptown regions. Uptown Manhattan is divided by Central Park into the Upper East Side and the Upper West Side, and above the park is Harlem

Brooklyn (Kings County: Pop. 2,528,050) is the city's most populous borough and was an independent city until 1898. Brooklyn is known for its cultural, social and ethnic diversity, an independent art scene, distinct neighborhoods and a unique architectural heritage. It is also the only borough outside of Manhattan with a distinct downtown area. The borough features a long beachfront and Coney Island, established in the 1870s as one of the earliest amusement grounds in the country.

Queens (Queens County: Pop. 2,270,338) is geographically the largest borough and the most ethnically diverse county in the United States, and may overtake Brooklyn as the city's most populous borough due to its growth. Historically a collection of small towns and villages founded by the Dutch, today the borough is largely residential and middle class. It is the only large county in the United States where the median income among African Americans, approximately $52,000 a year, is higher than that of White Americans. Queens is the site of Citi Field, the home of theNew York Mets, and annually hosts the U.S. Open tennis tournament. Additionally, it is home to two of the three major airports serving the New York metropolitan area, LaGuardia Airport and John F. Kennedy International Airport. (The third being Newark Liberty International Airport in New Jersey.)

Staten Island (Richmond County: Pop. 481,613) is the most suburban in character of the five boroughs. Staten Island is connected to Brooklyn by the Verrazano-Narrows Bridge and to Manhattan via the free Staten Island Ferry. The Staten Island Ferry is one of the most popular tourist attractions in New York City as it provides unsurpassed views of theStatue of Liberty, Ellis Island, and lower Manhattan. Located in central Staten Island, the 25 km² Greenbelt has some 35 miles (56 km) of walking trails and one of the last undisturbed forests in the city. Designated in 1984 to protect the island's natural lands, the Greenbelt comprises seven city parks. The FDR Boardwalk along South Beach is 2.5 miles (4.0 km) long, the fourth largest in the world

Okay..So much for the infos...Let me now take you to the good stuffs...

My to-do list in NYC

If you are a movie addict, New York will definitely be your number one place to visit. A lot of movies were filmed it this famous city that one of the reasons why tourists want to go here is to visit these certain places which became landmarks themselves. As for me, these are the things that i want to do

Visit the Empire State Building/ Observatory

Watch Broadway theatre productions

Visit museums such as the Metropolitan Museum of Art

Read a book while in Central Park..I just feel like it will be relaxing for me..Hahaha!! I would also like to ride a bike around this HUGE park..*wink..There is this scene from the American Adaptation of My Sassy Girl which i cannot forget. It was this scene wherein Elisha Cuthbert asked the guy to stand in the far end of this certain part of the park because she wants to know if she can be heard by the guy(i forgot his name). I also want to stand there with all these trees and stuff..hahaha!!!wala lang..gaya gaya lang...

Visit the Belvedere Castle along Central park Also

Ride a double-decker bus...

Ride their infamous NYC Yellow Taxi Cabs

Eat the infamous NYC pizza and Meatball Sub HEHEHE...

Go to the "TOP OF THE ROCK" Observation deck of the Rockefeller Center...and Take a picture in front of Rockefeller Center (if given a chance to go there in Winter, i would probably want to ice skate there hahaha!!)

Go to Times Square and take a picture in front of that big clock there hahaha!!

Buy the " I HEART NEW YORK T-SHIRT"

Have a luxury shopping trip along Fifth and Madison Avenues...Hahaha!!! I wish...

Go to the Statue of Liberty (Left)

Well, who would not want to see the universal symbol of freedom and democracy..

Have an ice cream at Serendipity. This is the favorite restaurant of Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen and i would really like to know why. Although I heard that you need to have a reservation just to get in in this infamous posh restaurant/coffee shop/gift shop. hahaha!!!..well, i already have their number hahaha...

Watch A Yankees Game at the Yankee Stadium..Okay,i am not a huge baseball fan. But i do know how the game works so i guess that makes be qualified to watch the game. And for the record, just as long as you know when to cheer and who to cheer for, then you're good!!!hahahaha!!

Watch the New York Rangers play. The New York Rangers is the city's major Hockey team. I've never watched a live hockey game so i guess this would be a fun experience.

Watch the New York Knicks play..Okay pwede na rin New York Liberty. Now this is what i really wanted to do. I am a HUGE basketball fan and i would really love to experience watching a live NBA game...Courtside..hahaha...and if i am really really lucky, the NY Knicks will play against L.A. Lakers..hahahaha!!!

Have the "Sex in the City" tour..hahaha...i am not really an avid fan but after seeing the movie, i kinda like to see the places where they filmed..hehehe...

Go to Madame Tussauds Wax Museum

Visit the SoHo neighborhood..hehehe...the Art District..

So far...these are the things that i have in mind...These are the things that i am looking forward of doing...hehe...

New York definitely fascinates me..And in reality..this is where i really wanted to go..hahaha...And if my folks would allow me.. I would like to go here on my own...

Well, it's because i want to have the New York experience which i can be proud of..I want to be able to tell my children (in the future) that i was one of those people who experienced New York at its best. And i was able to conquer New York by myself..So it's like embracing a new culture with a newfound independence...arte!!!

Trivia: These are some of the famous movies shot in NYC

1. King Kong (1933) shot at 34th st. and 5th avenue
2. An affair to remember(1957) shot at 34th st. and 5th avenue
3. The Seven-Year Itch(1955) shot at 52nd street and Lexington avenue..This is the movie where Marilyn Monroe did her infamous skirt-blowing stint (Right Below)
4. West-side story (1961) shot at Hell's Kitchen
5. Breakfast at Tiffany's (1961) shot at 5th ave. and 56th st....this was one of Audrey Hepburn's famous film
6. The Godfather (1972) shot at Little Italy
7. When Harry met Sally (1989) shot at E. Hosuton and Ludlow st....I've been dying to watch this film of Meg Ryan but i just can't find a copy of the movie..
8. Independence Day (1996) shot at New York Harbor..who can forget those freakin aliens ryt?hahahaha..
9. Spider Man (2002,2004,2007) shot at Midtown & Forest Hills, Queens...i was kinda hoping to see Peter Parker during my stay there in NYC..or perhaps his webs?hahahaha...
10. You've Got Mail (1996) Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan
11. Armageddon (1998)
12. Little Nicky (2000)...Adan Sandler..enough said..hahaha
13. X-Men (2000 and 2006)
14. Kate and Leopold (2001)..Hugh Jackman and Meg Ryan again hehehe..
15. SERENDIPITY!!!!!!! (2001) John Cusack and Kate Beckinsale...My ultimate reason why i wanted to go to NYC...hahahaha!!!Hopeless Romantic eh noh?hahhahaha...
16. Maid in Manhattan (2002)
17. Men in Black I and II (1997 AND 2002)
18. Uptown Girls (2003) Brittany Murphy and Dakota Fanning..
19. The Day after tomorrow..(2004)
20. New York Minute (2004) Ashley and Mary Kate Olsen...
21. The Devil wears Prada (2006)..sigh....
22. Inside Man (2006)
23. Night at the Museum (2006)
24. World Trade Center (2006)
25. Enchanted (2007) Patrick Dempsey..
26. My SASSY GIRL (2008)...the film i mentioned above..hehehe
27. Sex and the City...(2008)..where else right?
28. Bride Wars (2009)
29. Night at the Museum (2006 AND 2009)
30. Watchmen (2009)

(Although...if i may just say so...I'm kinda scared of going to NYC in a way...Well, you know, NYC have been destroyed in a lot of films before..so it's kind of scary hahahaha...and who could forget the WTC incident right?But this will not stop me from visiting my favorite city..)

So there people...Hope you had fun visiting NEW YORK with me!!!!..

Can't wait to "not sleep" in the "city that never sleeps" hahahha!!